Reflections on Growing Up

Well my last post was about the first day of school, and now I'm a little over a third of the way through this semester. I'm doing well in my classes, but I gotta keep it up and that's hard when you work a lot. I give major kudos to people who work more than one job and go to school full time. It's not easy, you basically have to cut off spending time with your family and friends to study. That's the toughest part for me, I would say.
I can go to class and show up for work, but studying takes effort and time, which I don't have a lot of. I've made a little change when school started - I am actively trying to get more sleep since I don't get enough usually. I should be sleeping right now in fact, but hey I've been doing a lot better in getting in my shut eye. I know a lot of people agree with me that there should be more hours in a day, especially when your body needs to sleep for at least 8-10 hours of it.

This is how it looks (ideally) from my perspective: 24 hours to get:
10 hours sleep
1.5 hours to get ready
.5 hours transportation time
8.5 hours at work, which leaves
3.5 hours to eat, spend time with v0id, study, catch up on email, blogs, forums, take care of dogs, sometimes cook, take care of household stuff, go grocery/necessity shopping, etc.

Even if I only got 8 hours of sleep, 5 hours isn't enough to do all of those things. I don't have time for life! I have to use up my main time to sleep, work, & go to school. Gah! I can't even have a hobby like painting/drawing, learning to play the piano, sewing so that I can make my own costumes, learning photography, or learning more about computers & photoshop, play my video games, the list could go on and on about things I want to do.

There's a new hire at my work, and I found out he's 17! Man I feel so old. I never thought I would see the day when I'm 23, and let me tell you I never pictured myself living this way at 23. I'm supposed to still be in the prime of my life, and what I find is that I'm tired. I constantly wish for more time to do the things I want to do. I told that 17 year old that growing up is overrated. It can be fun, but responsibilities are only easy when you have the means to fulfill them.

That reminds me of a guy who posted on reddit who felt like he worked his ass off for 30+ years and never got anywhere. Responses were all over the place of course, but I can't help but feel sorry for the guy. He's got a life where he gets by, but works and works and feels that it's all for nothing. How do we find that life for ourselves? Where we can be happy with what we do for a living, and content with the life we have built for ourselves?

I consider myself a lucky person with the hand that Life dealt me. Sometimes I feel guilty for complaining at all because there's millions of people around the world that have so much less than me and go hungry, etc etc etc. But it's not my fault that I'm here and they're there. As long as I'm not a stupid greedy stuck up bitch who thinks that they deserve everything, then I think I'm ok. I would like to help out in some way, but I just don't think I'm meant for that, who knows.

Well I've made it through another day, and that's all I seem to do. Take life day by day, because in reality there's nothing more I can do.

On a less melancholy note - hooray the rain is coming! Fall is my favorite season and I'm so happy it's here.

First Day of School

Well it's that time of year again, yes it's back to school.
I cracked open my textbook not too long ago, hoping to get a head start on the knowledge that needs to penetrate my brain - and yet here I am. Already procrastinating. On the FIRST day of school.

I blame it on the fact that I hate this school. About 3-4 months ago I was walking off campus to my car, and it happened to be the last day of class. I had taken my last final and everything was done and as I was walking underneath the beautiful giant trees that paint the campus in green and yellow (depending on time of year) I remember smiling because I was thinking that I never had to go back to that school ever again. Ever.

Damn was I wrong. I guess it was just my time in life where I was due for some shit to come my way since I've been having such an easy life lately. Couldn't be happier really.

Back to the procrastinating bit. If you look at it a different way, I actually AM ahead of the game, however. I bet you there is an extremely minute number of people who actually opened their textbook today and read a bit of it (even if it was just a paragraph). It's the first day for crying out loud. Nobody opens their books till about a couple days before the exam and then cries and then regains composure and tries to cram in as much as they can before eventually saying fuck it if I don't know it now, I won't know it by the time for the exam (think I've done this a few times?).

Well at least I got the classes that I need. That's all that matters at this point, well and of course passing them but that's nothing to fret about. So there you have it.

Some highlights of my day:
- My geography teacher is a funny guy. While talking about vegetation he said veggies instead. Also while calling roll he said Tiffany as if he were saying Tiff Annie. The best part was he really didn't do it on purpose Ha!
- He also asked if there were any good first person shooters for facebook
- That same classroom smelled like sweaty socks that had been rolled up into a fat man's ball sack for a week.
- Hooray for the school raising our tuition, giving the teachers pay cuts, and making them take furlough days so we have less days of classes. (Paying more money for less knowledge...not to mention too many students and too little classes)
- There were more but it's been a long day and my brain is already purging what happened

On to more procrastinating!

P.S. Those are pictures of my school

So uhh....feeling lonely?

Yes I know I know, I haven't updated. I'm a terrible person what can I say. Life can be hectic ya know? Good, but hectic. Oh, and stressful too! Damn.

Sometimes (most of the time) I wish I was a kid again so I wouldn't have a schedule and responsibilities and all this adult crap. But I happen to be one of the lucky ones though, I have a loving person to help me get through it all. Which, brings me to another topic. One of the kindest people on earth, who happens to be my very good friend, had a tragic life event - her fiance died. I don't even have the words to say what I feel about that. I just want to say that my heart goes out to her, and I hope she pulls through this. Can you imagine? I sure can't.

It's funny that in one of my classes we actually practiced being empathetic; but I learned a long time ago to always try to put yourself in some one else's shoes to see things from their point of view. Now I never said I do this all the time or that I'm good at it, I'm just saying I know it's very important to not go through life thinking the world revolves around you, and that your actions and words don't affect others.

I like to think that is one thing every person has in common - we all want to feel connected to others in some way, so we try to feel what they feel. And in doing so, we give ourselves a sense of being "normal." Of course this doesn't apply to say...hermits for example.

I'm so ready for this vacation. I read an article last week about how countries differ in the amount of vacation they take. Americans are some of the most overworked people out there. You should check this out for a quick look:http://www.gaebler.com/Productivity-and-Vacation-Comparisons-by-Country.htm

well I had a lot more stuff to write about, but I'm tired, and it's late...or early if you want to look at it another way. At least I'm excited about getting a hair cut tomorrow.
Don't you love my train of thought?

Missing Tiesto...

GRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!! I am seriously distraught and angry that I missed Tiesto tonight. I can't believe I let this slip through my fingers! He was here in my city and I didn't get to see him!! I'm shocking myself that I'm so upset over it.

I looked at the rest of his tour destinations and they are all non-U.S. places. He was down the frickin street from me! You know what, he still is down the street from me this very moment because it's 1:34am and his show was supposed to end at 1am.

Damn it.

The next time he's in my area I'm cancelling everything to go see him. Someone try and stop me! :::evil laugh::

Graduation

Well I finally did it. I definitely didn't think that my college experience would be anything like it was....but not in the good way that you are probably thinking. I found college 10% interesting 90% crap. Seriously most of it was just a reiteration of a lot of the things that I learned in high school. I think I'm lucky to have learned so much in high school, versus somebody who learned nothing, and then got to college and found they weren't prepared for it.

So after many years of wading through mucky crap that is a college you don't enjoy going to, I'm finally done. Thank you Jeesuuss I don't ever have to go back there ever again!! I'm honestly excited to go my grad school, it's where I want to go. I hope I find happiness in school, because I generally have a happy life and school was one area that I was not content.

I have high hopes for the future and even though I'm shit scared of it, I know everything's gonna be all right.

Oh Noes!

Ahh I'm slipping already! There I was, posting away thinking I was doing great. Then bam! 6 days later is finally a new post!
Well at least I have an excuse. I've got some stomach bug that I've had for 4 days now and I won't even being to tell you how much it royally sucks ass.

So uhh yeah. Last week of classes. Assignments due, final exams to take next week, work all day tomorrow, fighting off teh sickn3ss, not to mention all the other things that I have to do in daily life and that makes one tired me.

So goodnight. It's gonna be 1am before I get to bed, and I gotta wake up at 7:30. yay me.

Yoga Class

Alright, so this is going to be a little disturbing, so if you're easily grossed out, you should skip this post.

So I went to a yoga class at my gym today, and I've only been to an actual class a few times in my life. I've done yoga at home, but not regularly. I really liked the yoga class and every time I go I wonder why I don't go all the time, or at least more often. Then I remember oh yeah...I'm lazy. This really needs to stop.

So here comes the kinda gross part. The class is pretty packed and we're in close proximity to each other and we go into the pose where you are on your back, knees bent and spread open (like a chick waitin for a guy to put it in). And that's when I smelled it. No really. Some chick had to have been on her rag and it was nasty funky!!! Ewww I was so grossed out. Come on people, I'm a girl too. I have enough common sense to not go out to a yoga class spreading my legs while I'm on my period so people can smell my junk. Seriously I think she didn't use tampons cause that's how bad it smelled.

Hah I love this blog. I can say whatever I want to say and not talk my husband's ear off! Hooray.