Reflections on Growing Up

Well my last post was about the first day of school, and now I'm a little over a third of the way through this semester. I'm doing well in my classes, but I gotta keep it up and that's hard when you work a lot. I give major kudos to people who work more than one job and go to school full time. It's not easy, you basically have to cut off spending time with your family and friends to study. That's the toughest part for me, I would say.
I can go to class and show up for work, but studying takes effort and time, which I don't have a lot of. I've made a little change when school started - I am actively trying to get more sleep since I don't get enough usually. I should be sleeping right now in fact, but hey I've been doing a lot better in getting in my shut eye. I know a lot of people agree with me that there should be more hours in a day, especially when your body needs to sleep for at least 8-10 hours of it.

This is how it looks (ideally) from my perspective: 24 hours to get:
10 hours sleep
1.5 hours to get ready
.5 hours transportation time
8.5 hours at work, which leaves
3.5 hours to eat, spend time with v0id, study, catch up on email, blogs, forums, take care of dogs, sometimes cook, take care of household stuff, go grocery/necessity shopping, etc.

Even if I only got 8 hours of sleep, 5 hours isn't enough to do all of those things. I don't have time for life! I have to use up my main time to sleep, work, & go to school. Gah! I can't even have a hobby like painting/drawing, learning to play the piano, sewing so that I can make my own costumes, learning photography, or learning more about computers & photoshop, play my video games, the list could go on and on about things I want to do.

There's a new hire at my work, and I found out he's 17! Man I feel so old. I never thought I would see the day when I'm 23, and let me tell you I never pictured myself living this way at 23. I'm supposed to still be in the prime of my life, and what I find is that I'm tired. I constantly wish for more time to do the things I want to do. I told that 17 year old that growing up is overrated. It can be fun, but responsibilities are only easy when you have the means to fulfill them.

That reminds me of a guy who posted on reddit who felt like he worked his ass off for 30+ years and never got anywhere. Responses were all over the place of course, but I can't help but feel sorry for the guy. He's got a life where he gets by, but works and works and feels that it's all for nothing. How do we find that life for ourselves? Where we can be happy with what we do for a living, and content with the life we have built for ourselves?

I consider myself a lucky person with the hand that Life dealt me. Sometimes I feel guilty for complaining at all because there's millions of people around the world that have so much less than me and go hungry, etc etc etc. But it's not my fault that I'm here and they're there. As long as I'm not a stupid greedy stuck up bitch who thinks that they deserve everything, then I think I'm ok. I would like to help out in some way, but I just don't think I'm meant for that, who knows.

Well I've made it through another day, and that's all I seem to do. Take life day by day, because in reality there's nothing more I can do.

On a less melancholy note - hooray the rain is coming! Fall is my favorite season and I'm so happy it's here.